


Back To December

by CloudPhillips



Category: Red Velvet (K-pop Band)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-12
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:35:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25222498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CloudPhillips/pseuds/CloudPhillips
Summary: It was only a month before December 13
Relationships: Bae Joohyun | Irene/Son Seungwan | Wendy
Comments: 1
Kudos: 35





	1. Fin

**_A month before December 13_ **

The sensation of featherlight touches stirred Joohyun from her sleep. It traced patterns along the slender tilt of her nose down to the curve of her jaw before an voice so sweet yet distant whispered to her ear. "Wake up sleepyhead."

A soft smile broke on the corners of her lips before she lazily dragged her arms and clung onto the person beside her. "Five more minutes Wan." She groaned upon burying herself in the comforts of her lover's embrace, deeply smelling the scent of jasmine and relishing in the warmth Seungwan had to offer.

"You said that earlier." Seungwan fondly ran her fingers through the smooth tresses of Joohyun's raven hair before affectionately placing a lingering kiss on her forehead. "Come on you lazy butt. I already cooked breakfast." Her efforts remained futile since Joohyun wouldn't budge.

"Please. Just give me five more minutes with you." Was Joohyun's simple response as she tightened her hold around Seungwan, clearly indicating that she had no intentions of letting go. In the end, Seungwan finally relented because how could she ever say no to Joohyun.

Five minutes turned to ten until it lasted for an hour before Seungwan decided that Joohyun had enough rest. The sunlight was already streaming from the curtains and birds were already chirping merrily to start the wonderful day. Brushing away stray locks of raven hair, Seungwan nudged her girlfriend awake. "Wake up Hyun. You need to let me go."

Seungwan's odd choice of sentence brought a chill down her spine and promptly caused a small frown to paint her features. Joohyun didn't like hearing those words. She greatly detested it. Tightening her hold around her girlfriend's waiste, she whispered hollowly. "I won't."

The blonde merely shook her head. "Then you'll be stuck with me forever." If they'll just laze around all they, they won't get anything done. At this point, will they ever accomplish anything?

"Good. Because I'm binding myself to you."

"If you keep saying things like that, how can you expect me not to marry you?"

***

**_A week before December 13_ **

"So when are we gonna get married?"

Joohyun abruptly asked Seungwan out of the blue when they were cuddling on the couch, enjoying the warmth of the fireplace while sipping hot chocolate on a cold night. Snow fell like droplets of rain and enveloped the earth in a winter wonderland. Christmas was already nearing and most people were out buying presents. Meanwhile, the couple decided to skip the holiday rush and just spend some time together.

Seungwan choked on her drink and felt the hot beverage scalding her tongue. Joohyun soothingly patted her back as she tried to recover from the shock. "What??" The blonde probably looked like a bewildered mess but she completely blames her girlfriend for making her like this.

"I said, when are we going to get married?" Joohyun repeated, like a mother speaking to a toddler, perfectly enunciating the words to ensure that Seungwan would hear them correctly.

"I don't know Hyun. Don't you think it's a little sudden for that?" Seungwan preoccupied herself with wiping away the stain on her sleeves. Her girlfriend remained silent for long while and when she looked up, saw Joohyun frowning in disdain.

"So you don't want to get married with me?" She was demanding an explanation and didn't look quite at all pleased. Joohyun probably took offense in that statement.

Seungwan was quick to backtrack and reassure her. "No no no. It's just that... I would still have to buy you one of those large diamond rings with 24 carats, take you out on an expensive dinner, sweep you off your feet and propose under the night sky." She rubbed her neck and acted all sheepish. "I actually planned everything back before to make sure the plan was perfect. All that's left is my properly timed execution."

The blonde was fully rambling now. Her hands flew around to make wild gestures and Joohyun found her heart melting at her girlfriend's confession. She was happy, completely over the moon, upon knowing that she wasn't the only feeling the same way. That she wasn't the only one thinking of spending their whole lives together.

"I don't want a fancy wedding." Joohyun gingerly took Seungwan's hand and laced their fingers together. "I just want you." She lifted her gaze and stared deeply into those eyes with deep pools of brown that she countlessly found herself drowning in.

"I want to grow old with you."

There was tension in the way their gazes met. The gap between them slowly diminished until they forgot which one began and the other ended. Seungwan conquered Joohyun in a feat of everlasting kiss as their bodies joined together in a heated urgency. Clothes were torn and wills clashed. Joohyun was unable to contain a moan when Seungwan bit a particularly sensitive spot. She wanted to fight the blonde for dominance but she was helpless, especially when her lover expertly used her fingers to draw out the monster inside of Joohyun. Halos of light clouded her vision and she gasped breathlessly as Seungwan brought her to another high. When she was about to reach the peak, she cried out. "Take me! Take all of me!" All the while staring into those brown orbs when she felt those lips marking her, claiming her, _conquering_ her.

Seungwan grunted as she continued her ministrations and together they lapsed into surreal bliss. Their height of passion slowly dwindling to a mellow crescendo. The blonde collapsed on top of her and sweat clung onto their bodies after their passionate lovemaking but all Joohyun could ever think about was having Seungwan close. There was a lull of silence in the air as they stared into each other's eyes and Joohyun declared the words she had long kept hidden.

"Please don't ever leave me."

Seungwan didnt deign a reply as she affectionately placed a kiss on her forehead. "I'll be yours until the sun doesn't shine."

Her lips trailed along slender nose. "Til' time stands still."

"Until the winds don't blow."

Then she sealed her promise with a kiss.

***

**_A day before December 13_ **

"Babe. I need to leave."

Seungwan was already donning her coat and tying shoes when she called out to Joohyun, who was lounging by the living room, watching the daily weather forecast. The news anchor predicted that a heavy storm will hit tomorrow and adviced everyone to stay indoors to avoid getting stranded.

"Where are you going?" Joohyun frowned when she saw the blonde heading for the doors.

"Just gonna buy some groceries. I won't be taking long." Her girlfriend shrugged before taking the keys from the bowl by the counter and checked her wallets for extra money.

For some reason, Joohyun felt uneasy as dread crept up her spine. She watched as her girlfriend kissed her farewell and headed towards the door. This odd sense of deja vú became something she couldn't ignore. Like, Seungwan leaving her alone somehow happened before and that thought alone scared her.

"Wan?" She called out just before the blonde could fully walk out the door.

"Yes?" Her girlfriend flashed her a bright smile. Joohyun couldn't shake the feeling that this would be the last time she'd ever see Seungwan.

"Don't go where I can't follow."

With that, she watched Seungwan walk out the door and completely left her alone.

***

**_An hour before December 13_ **

"Unnie, are you going to visit the memorial later?"

Seulgi spoke through the other end of the phone. She called a few moments before to check on Joohyun, knowing that today was a very special day, and see how her friend was doing.

It's been years... years since Seulgi talked to Joohyun. They've lost contact since _she_ left and Joohyun haven't been the same ever since. The older girl had become more withdrawn and reclusive. She had never fully recovered from her loss. Joohyun practically had her entire soul ripped away after that unfortunate car accident. It was understandable that she was still grieving.

A flash of lightning briefly lighted the sky followed by the mighty roar of the thunder and that's when the rain started to pour.

"No Seul. I'll be staying home." Joohyun was pacing around the house, trying to calm the rising panick in her heart. Her hands wouldn't stop trembling and her entire body felt numb. Seungwan still hasn't returned and she was becoming terrified.

What if something happened to her along the way?

What if she couldn't come back home?

What if?

There was a brief pause at the other end of the line before Seulgi broke the silence. "Joohyun." The gravity of her tone caused the older girl to momentarily stop pacing. "You should go. It's been years since you last visited and I'm sure _she_ misses you."

For some reason, anger bubbled inside Joohyun and she was unable to stop herself from lashing out. "Don't you dare speak about _her!_ "

"You can't hide from reality forever." Seulgi's calm and understanding voice did nothing to alleviate her frustration. It only made it worse. "I think it's time you accept that she'll never come back."

"No one asked for your opinion _Kang Seulgi._ " With gritted teeth, Joohyun ended the call and threw the phone away. The device hit the wall and broke into several pieces then rendered completely useless. Thunder roared above the heavens and Joohyun could only watch as the rain poured on and on. It seemed like it would never stop. She needed to find her girlfriend and bring her home.

Staring at the dark sky, she clenched her fists and decided to visit the only place where she could find Seungwan.

***

_December 13_

Joohyun finally arrived at her intended destination. Only brief flashes of lightning seared the sky and the rain had somehow stopped pouring. It seemed like a diving being was watching Joohyun and keeping her safe. Maybe it was _her_ all along.

Releasing a shaky breath, she got out of the car and trudged through the snow as she made her way along the familiar path leading to the cemetery. She decided to visit today. Seulgi was right. It's been a long time coming and she couldn't hide from reality forever.

It's about time she found closure.

Stopping in front of a marbled tombstone laid on the ground, Joohyun settled down and carefully brushed away the snow that accumulated in order to discern the words imprinted on the slab.

_Here lies Son Seungwan_

_Born: February 21, 1994_

_Died: December 13, 2020_

_No matter the distance between us, we’re always gonna be under the same sky._

"So you finally came after all this time."

Her gaze shifted to the person she'd been missing for years, casually leaning against the tombstone and flashing that megawatt smile, acting completely nonchalant as if she never left Joohyun devastated. Just the sight of her presence caused the older girl to break. It was painful seeing her like this and Joohyun was still hurting. This emptiness will probably never go away now that _she_ took everything with her. "Seungwan."

"You promised you would never leave."

The smile on the blonde's lips was slowly replaced by a frown. "I know."

But Joohyun was too late to stop the tears from falling. "You promised that we'd get married and grow old together." Maybe she was holding on to this pain for too long. Maybe it was time she let it all out.

"You promised not to go to a place where I can't follow."

She missed Seungwan. She missed everything about her.

"Maybe if I hadn't argued with you on that day then you'd still be here beside me now."

Joohyun finally found the courage to stare into directly into her eyes. The very same eyes that haunted her every waking moment.

"When I stay up at night, I stare at the empty side of the bed and wonder about the things I would tell you if you were lying next to me."

Tears fell like droplets of rain.

"I can't do this without you."

A beat.

A moment of silence.

"You have to let me go Joohyun." Seungwan tried to reach out but her advances were denied.

"No!" Joohyun shook her head vehemently. She refused to forget Seungwan. How can she do that? How can she just forget the person she offered her heart to? How can she forget the very reason she was still breathing?

"You have to let me go my love. Stop dwelling in the past and just accept that I can never come back." Seungwan sat on the ground before Joohyun and gingerly wiped away the tears that stained her cheeks. "You still have your whole life ahead of you. Don't let the dead hold you back."

"Live for me Joohyun."

Seungwan laughed wholeheartedly and Joohyun had never before seen such a breathtaking sight. She tried to commit every bit of her features into memory so she could not forget... would never forget.

Her silky blonde hair that flowed against the breeze.

Her deep pools of brown eyes that held secrets of the universe.

Her soft lips that Joohyun will forever yearn to kiss.

"I love you." Joohyun whispered a promise.

Seungwan smiled contentedly and a glowing bright light enveloped her entire being. Joohyun watched as the love of her life was bathed in the sunlight and completely disappeared before her eyes, leaving her alone in that empty cemetery.

_When blue returned home, the sky could only mourn in gray._


	2. Annex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She looked… dead.
> 
> And maybe she was.
> 
> But not to Joohyun.

**_A month later_ **

Joohyun hauled the groceries from the car and painstakingly made her way towards the familiar decrepit path leading to her house. After opening the door and successfully keeping the perishable goods intact, she got inside the premises and flicked on the lights. The sight of her desolate living space was the first thing that greeted her.

Nevermind the empty bottles of beer that littered the ground, the stale food being infested with flies, soiled clothes piled thrown haphazardly by the hamper, nor the dirty dishes that had been sitting neglected on the sink for weeks. The usually spotless house was now unrecognizable. It seemed like the whole place had been burglarized.

Never mind the photographs of _Seungwan_ was plastered on every wall and had a little shrine dedicated to her by the altar that served as a memento.

A stark reminder for what Joohyun had _lost_.

Sighing heavily, the older girl took off her shoes and carelessly dropped the groceries on the floor while completely ignoring how some of the fragile goods got destroyed. They'll eventually spoil in a few days but Joohyun couldn't be bothered. The light has left her soul and she stopped caring long ago. What was the point of living? She was all alone anyway.

There were sounds echoing from the living room and her ears perked up at the sudden stimulus. Her eyes widened in realization which caused her heart to race rapidly. It was a sensation Joohyun hadn't felt for a long time since _she_ left. Without meaning to, her feet unconsciously led her towards the sound.

The movie **_Ghost_** by _Demi Moore_ and _Patrick Swayze_ was playing on the television. Joohyun saw the familiar mop of golden blonde locks and a small relieved smile lifted on her lips. She leaned against the wall and crossed her arms as she took a moment to study the figure sitting by the couch, looking all stiff and unmoving.

“I’m home babe.” Joohyun casually sat beside the figure and reached out to intertwine their hands, like she always used to do whenever they were having a cuddling session while binge-watching movies. A sigh escaped her lips. Joohyun had been alone for so long and now _she_ finally came back.

“I told you to let me go.” The _woman_ beside her stared ahead. Her expression unflinching and distant. She was not really paying attention to everything surrounding her, not even Joohyun, and her brown eyes, which usually sparked with warmth, now lost their light. _She_ changed. Not like the cheerful person she used to be when she was alive. She was here but her presence was not fully here. Not in the house they used to call a home.

She looked… _dead_.

And maybe she _was_.

But not to Joohyun.

The older woman frowned, not pleased in hearing that accusatory tone. All she ever wanted was to see that breathtaking smile again and hear that mesmerizing voice that her heart had grown to miss. Joohyun just wanted _her_ back.

It doesn’t matter now. The grieving woman had gotten out of touch from reality long ago. They will be together forever and even death will not separate them.

For Joohyun will never let _her_ go.

“I’m sorry _Seungwan_.”


End file.
